Repentance - Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23:

I went to work and was a complete and utter mess the entire time. I hated that my co-workers constantly asked me questions about Edward. If they really gave a damn, they would let me be there with him, and not in the office.

The day was unbelievably slow. As soon as the clock said 4:59 p.m. I was out of there. I rushed to the hospital and naturally went back to the ICU waiting room. Nobody was there. I called Esme and she informed me where they were.

I took the elevator three floors up to the recovery unit, where they had moved Edward earlier in the day. Esme and Carlisle were the only ones in the room. Edward looked a little better, but he was still out of it.

Carlisle said Edward was still breathing on his own and the swelling in his brain had gone down a little bit. He was beginning to bruise all over, but the swelling around his eyes had gone down.

Emse and I agreed to start taking shifts. She would stay with him during the day while I worked and I would spend the night with him. Carlisle convinced the hospital to bring in an additional bed, so I wouldn’t have to sleep on a cot or lumpy chair.

It felt strange being alone with Edward after Carlisle and Esme left. I felt the need to do something, to help him, to comfort him in some way, but I didn’t know what to do.

I eventually grew tired of staring at him and trying to get him to talk. I called Alice and spoke to her and Masen for a few minutes before deciding to go to bed. It was still a little early, but I was several days behind on sleep.

I climbed into the hospital bed, wishing I was strong enough to push it closer to Edward. I laid on my side, facing him and eventually drifted off to sleep to the rhythmic sound of some nearby beeping machine. I imagined it was Edward’s heart.

I woke some time later to the sound of Edward gasping for air and screaming. I climbed out of the bed quickly, losing my footing and falling on my right knee.

“Ouch!” I yelped and struggled to my feet. “Edward? It’s okay.”

Edward glanced at me quickly, he looked fearful and confused. “Where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital. You’re safe.”

His swollen eyes darted quickly around the room and he brought his hands to his head as if it hurt, and closed his eyes tightly.

I stood close to him and ran my hands through his messy hair. “How do you feel?”

He lowered his hands and looked up at me. “Am I alive?”

“Yes, of course you are.”

“I thought you were dead,” he said factually.

I shook my head. “No, I’m fine, Edward.”

“He said you were dead. He got to you before they came for me. I wanted to die.”

“Edward, stop. You’re not making any sense. I’m fine; Masen is fine. You’re the only one we’re worried about.”

“Masen? Where is he? Where is James?”

“Masen is with Alice. I don’t know where James is.”

“I have to find him.” Edward threw the blankets off of his lower extremities and attempted to get out of the bed, quickly learning he couldn’t move. He had a cast from the top of his right leg to just above his calf.

He looked at his leg. “What is this? I need to go.”

“Edward, lay down. Your leg is broken. You are not going anywhere.”

Edward suddenly screeched loudly and began gripping his right side. He looked down and held his hand up, it was covered in blood.

I gasped. “Edward, stop. Just lay down and relax. Stop moving!” I went to push the button to call the nurse.

“What happened to me?”

I ignored him and went to the door to meet the nurse.

“He’s bleeding from the right side; I don’t know where it is coming from.”

Two nurses rushed past me, one nearly slipping in the small pool of blood that had formed next to Edward’s bed.

Edward became combative, demanding to know what was going on. The nurses pulled up his gown and revealed a large gash in his side, it looked like a few of his stitches had pulled out from his surgery.

Edward started swinging his arms. “What the hell is this? Don’t touch me!” he screamed.

I rushed over to him, on the opposite side from the nurses who were dodging his failing arms. I brushed my fingers across his face. “Edward, please, calm down. They’re only trying to help you. Please! You’re going to hurt yourself even more.”

He suddenly relaxed and just stared at me blankly. “You’re really pretty.” He reached up and touched my cheek. “Who are you?”

Tears immediately pooled in my eyes. Edward was all over the place. He wasn’t making any sense. I glanced up at the nurses.

“It happens sometimes with a brain injury. He’ll be okay in a few days, don’t worry. We have to get him back to the operating room.” The two ladies unplugged a few things and began rolling Edward away. He started screaming at me.

“Bella? Bella! Don’t leave me!”

“I’ll be right here, Edward.” I choked out, before he disappeared through doorway.

I broke down once he was gone. He was completely all over the place. He knew me one minute and not the next. After I collected myself, I called Esme and Carlisle and let them know what happened. Carlisle assured me Edward would come through. He was just confused. Once the swelling subsided completely he would be back to his normal self. Esme was on her way before I got off the phone with Carlisle.

I sat and watched as someone came in to clean and disinfect Edward’s room. It seemed like Edward had been gone a long time. Esme arrived and Edward still hadn’t returned. She demanded answers from the nurses station, but nobody would tell us anything, only that he was still in surgery. They assured us it was nothing serious, that they just had to re-stitch his incision and clean it out.

Esme and I waited and waited. It was shortly before 2:00 a.m. when they rolled Edward back into the room. He was awake. The doctor said they only used a local anesthetic. He advised it would take some time for Edward to remember everything, but he would come around. The doctor and nurses finally left.

Esme went to Edward’s side immediately. “How are you feeling?”

Edward sighed. “Disoriented, confused, and in a world of pain. Where is Bella?”

Esme looked up at me. “She’s right here, Edward. On your left.”

I moved closer to him. His left eye was more swollen than the right, so I assumed I wasn’t in his peripheral vision. I set my hand on his bruised arm. “I’m here, Edward.”

“Are you okay?” he asked.

I nodded my head.

“Have they caught him?”

I shook my head. “Not yet. Everything is out now, the whole truth. I told them everything.”

“Good.”

“They said I didn’t have to press charges, but they want to speak with you. They want more details about the fraternity. They took my computer as evidence. They are in the process of contacting all the girls as well.”

“Where are you staying? Where is Masen?”

“I’ve either been here or with Alice. Masen is with Alice and Jasper. Alice and Rose cleaned up the apartment, so I’ll probably be going back there soon.”

Edward’s eyes grew large and he gripped my hand tightly. “No!”

“Edward, I can’t keep depending on Jasper and Alice. They have their own issues to deal with.”

“You are not going back there until James and Laurent are behind bars.”

“Who is Laurent?”

“The one you call Dreadlocks.”

“Oh. We can talk about it later. You should rest.”

Edward sighed. He looked to his mother. “When can I get out of here? Where is Dad? What’s my prognosis?”

Esme hesitated. “I don’t know when, Edward. Your right leg is broken. You were stabbed four times; you had major surgery. I imagine you will be here for a while. Even then, it will take some time. You will need a lot of physical therapy.”

Edward rolled his eyes. “I’m starving.”

“You cannot have anything yet, just some ice chips,” Esme said.

I reached over to the side table and pulled a few ice chips from the cup and put them against Edward’s dry and cracked lips. His tongue slipped out from between his lips, lightly brushing my finger tips and the ice chips were gone.

Esme stepped out to call Carlisle.

I fed Edward some more ice chips. When they were all gone I leaned down and whispered in his ear. “I love you, Edward. I was so worried. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.”

I felt Edward’s arm come around me and his hand tangle in my hair. He breathed deeply. “Bella, I love you. How long have I been out? I feel like I haven’t seen you or touched you in a long time.”

“Just a few days.” I leaned back and hesitated. “Um, Edward? Do you remember me being there before the ambulance arrived?”

Edward’s eyes moved back and forth, as if he were searching his memory. “Vaguely, I think.”

“Do you remember anything you told me? Or anything I told you?”

Edward hesitated for a moment before looking up at me. “No, I don’t. Should I?”

I shrugged. “No, I was just curious.”

I knew I should tell him that I was pregnant, but he seemed too fragile. I wanted to wait until he was more stable.

“Will you bring Masen tomorrow?” he asked.

“Edward, I don’t think that’s a good idea. I don’t want him to see you like this, it might scare him. I don’t want him to worry. He has no idea what happened.”

“Oh,” Edward said, disappointed. “Okay. Will you tell him I miss him?”

“Of course, Edward.”

I was holding the left side of his face in the palm of my hand and he turned his head into my hand, nuzzling it.

“I’m sorry, Bella. I’m so tired.” He kissed my palm and closed his eyes. I noticed his skin felt warm, almost feverish.

“It’s okay, Edward. Go to sleep. I’ll be right here.” I kissed his forehead and when I was sure he was asleep, I went to find Esme.

Esme and I spoke briefly. She went back to her hotel and I went back to Edward’s room. He was awake when I came in.

“Where were you?” he asked.

“I just stepped out for a minute. Go back to sleep.” I climbed back into the bed next to his.

“Will you lay with me?” he asked, his voice laced with desperation.

I sighed. “Edward, I don’t think that’s a good idea. That’s a small bed. I don’t think the nurses would like that very much.”

“Please, Bella. I need you.”

My heart sank. I couldn’t say no to him. I got out of the bed I was in and climbed into Edward’s bed. It was higher than mine and fairly difficult to get in and out of. He tried to scoot over for me, but he couldn’t really move due to the cast on his leg. I laid on my side next to him, practically half on top of him.

“Are you uncomfortable?” he asked.

I was, but I wouldn’t tell him so. “No, I’m fine.” I looked up and kissed his lips briefly. “Go back to sleep, baby.”

Edward smiled and it made me feel better. I’d give anything to keep that smile on his face.

I snuggled in closer to him and fell asleep, listening to the sound of his heart beating again, finally.

I was woken up early the next morning by Carlisle.

“Bella, don’t you need to get to work?”

I rubbed my eyes and sat up. “Yea, what time is it?”

“Shortly after 7:00 a.m.”

“Where is Esme?” I asked.

“She was going to sleep a little late, so I came down to relieve you.”

“Oh, thank you.” After glancing at Edward and seeing that he was still sound asleep I crawled out of the bed. I gathered a few of my things and went back to Edward’s side before leaving.

“I have to go to work, Edward. I’ll be back this evening.” I kissed his forehead, expecting him to wake up, but he didn’t. “I love you.” I sighed and turned to leave when he didn’t respond.

I went to work and was actually semi-productive. I wasn’t as worried about Edward as I had been previously. I was glad he was coming to and doing better, or so it seemed.

I picked up Masen from daycare and took him to Alice and Jasper’s place. I filled them in on Edward’s condition and that I thought he was doing better. Masen had a huge temper tantrum before I left because he couldn’t go see Edward with me. I felt terrible, but I just didn’t want him to see Edward in that condition and I didn’t want Masen exposed to all the germs and illness in the hospital. I didn’t need two sick boys.

I returned to the hospital and made my way to the recovery floor. Sometimes the place was like a maze. I accidentally went into the wrong room at first, but nobody was in there.

I made my way back to the nurses station and went across to the opposite wing and entered the second room on the left. There was an elderly lady in the bed who sounded like she was hacking up a lung. I shuddered and went back the in the direction I came. I had gotten so turned around. I stood in the middle of the nurses station, near the elevators and retraced my steps. I went back down the right wing and into the second room on the left. I was sure this was Edward’s room. The room was empty. I suddenly began to panic. Where was he? Why hadn’t anyone called me?

I returned to the nurses station and inquired about him.

“He’s back in ICU,” the old overweight lady said without even acknowledging my presence.

“Why? What happened?” I asked.

“I don’t know. You’ll have to ask them.” She turned away from me suddenly and went about doing something else on a nearby computer.

I scoffed and headed back to the elevators. My heart was racing. He was doing better I thought. I hurried down to ICU and of course I couldn’t see him. I made my way to the general waiting room area where I saw Esme and Carlisle.

“What is going on?” I asked. “Why didn’t someone call me!” I nearly screamed.

Esme had been crying. Her eyes were red and puffy. Carlisle stood quickly and came to me, trying to get me to be quiet.

“He took a turn for the worse, Bella.” Carlisle said as he put his arm around me.

I shrugged out of his embrace. “What do you mean? He was fine when I left this morning.”

“He began to run a very a high fever. They believe he has some sort of infection. They’re trying to control it with antibiotics.”

I sat down in a nearby chair and crossed my arms. I was furious. I couldn’t comprehend what I was hearing. “Why didn’t you call me?” I asked through tear filled eyes. “You don’t know what it was like going into his room and realizing he wasn’t there!”

“I’m sorry, Bella. We weren’t thinking.”

I sighed and turned away from them, anxiously watching the clock on the wall. Thirty more minutes until visiting time.

I went to see Edward first while Esme and Carlisle waited. He looked about the same, but definitely feverish. He skin was flushed and his hair was damp. Maybe he was sweating and his fever was breaking. I grabbed a notepad nearby and began to fan him with it.

He was groggy but eventually opened his eyes. “Where am I?” he asked.

“You’re back in ICU. How do you feel?”

He just groaned, he didn’t really respond.

I kissed his cheek. “I’m sorry you’re in so much pain.”

His eyes opened and he looked straight at me. “I just want to go home, Bella.”

My heart broke. “I know you do, baby. You have to get better first.”

Edward nodded his head and drifted back to sleep.

I left so Carlisle and Esme could have a few minutes with him.

After they returned to the waiting room, I apologized for getting upset with them earlier and I went to class since there was nothing else I could do.

Over the next week I visited Edward as much as I could. They finally got his temperature under control and moved him back to a recovery room. Things seemed like they were finally starting to progress, albeit slowly, for Edward.

**CHAPTER 24 - CLICK HERE**